Selamat Hari Raya

+Selamat Hari Raya to all+
+maafkan salah silap , terkasar bahasa, terlajak kata, tersilap percaturan, sesungguhnya saya tidak sempurna...+


to hamidah syuaibah: thanks & sorry for everything
u never give up on me---i know that, i love u soooo much n u r my bestie
forever!!

+ emo...+

apabila hal ketidaksempurnaan yang diperbincangkan, i just sitting here silently, tears rolling on mycheek and im telling myself "shhhHHhhh...dun be sad..u know u r not doing good enuff in many things, n even sumtyme u forgot bout what GOD ask u to do n prohibit u from things u shudnt do. no1 gonna help u. n u know to whom u should turn to...GOD, give me light, give me strength n give me loves" -i end up praying....

saye redha.....

stress therapy=)

I was captivated by d’lush, beautiful picture of this 1 lady with curly hair (I wont reveal who is she- I think few close frens of mine sure can guess-lorrr) – big curl hair really works on her. So yesterday, I dragged myself to sg.wang to do a lil bit hairdo for my hair. N tadaa….. here I’ve got it perm! Congratulations!- sound like im gonna have a great look like her-heh! Ridiculous! I know. But dats me. Keep on changing my hairstyle is one of my irresistible habit. I think I already changed my hairstyle bout 3tymes dis year. Its juz I still keep it long, over my shoulder length wif layered cut. I think I easily getting bored wif d’same hairstyle and d’max period dat I can bear maybe more or less 3 months!sigh….


So, dis experiment will be last around next week.obviously bfore raya. I dun want to ruin my “raya” day wif ugly,messy hair. Wuwuuww..but I think its gonna be fine, I love d’outcome for what ive done yesterday actually. =) .credit to d’hairstylist. Yeah, back to d’ “keep on changing my hairstyle” topic, I think “posh” is d’best person to bcome s d’icon as every1 knows she keeps on trying to get her best look by changing her hairstyle. And posh really deserve dat “posh” nick name as she knows d’best way to present d’ “posh” name. And beckham as well, they are a perfect couple dewh. Stylo, bravo n posh-O.hehehe.. (is there any word like dat?).haha.

Okie, back to work, I think every nite bfore going to sleep, I told myself to wake up early d’next day n wif full zest n energy im going to sleep juz to make my objective for d’next day to be fulfilled. But I rarely achieve d’objective when I slowly open my eyes 1 hr late than my alarm suppose to scream. And I do things sluggishly juz to take d’s0-called-my-rajin-mood-to-do-things and I end up reach office 1 hour late than I expected. And every morning im going to d’office stressed, rushed and frazzled and I juz make things worse occay. I know2. its bad.sigh. i need some motivations to be as a hardworking gurl, I think. But what d’heck if I still have to go home after “break fast” tyme or still late than 1900hrs in d;evening? Ouh,so I think its better for me to reach office around 9 n go home around –erghhhh – anytime after 1900hrs. grRRRRrr….so, now make sense y Im going late 2 d’offce rite? So, no more resolution to wake up early in d’morning. Hurray!!!!!haha… sudah doinks saye ini. Enuffla of being as a morning person thingy.

Love life: mr boyfren told me he’ll be going to spain for a week after his crew change n then will be in Malaysia for 2 weeks, than fly back to Norway for a week until the next crew change. So, 6weeks of waiting, 2 weeks of loveyy-doveyy tyme n 5weeks of waiting again. Anyone tougher than me in handling “distance situation”? Put ur hands up!

A guy wif his retarded face -whom i miss d'most!

Later. Taaa….

On d'way of taking compliments (small topic only) =)

U gonna squirm at compliments given to u or juz accept it wif grace?
Me? Squirm + negate it a bit + sometimes retort wif a feigned “really?” “am i?” “u think so?- (haha, please la,u guys did dat also rite?hehe- juz to double confirm actually- *big grin*) . lots of reactions. But it differs according to d’person who’s doing the complimenting, rite? If I know its work related and I feel its well deserved, so ill react wif a simple thank then, but if I know it sounds like sooo beayoutiful or sound insincere (like having “kepentingan2 tertentu”- seperti apabila anda menerima compliments from mr louqe or cik hamidah- please juz ignore it and put on a poker face –haha…)

Iskh. Y dis topic came out? Saje2. hehe. Juz its part of our topic dat ;ve been discussed during our catchin’ up session yesterday. And it was funny. Mls nak cerite panjang,nanti mcm mengumpat plak…hehhee..kering pahale puase saye –wuwuwuwuw….

Ouh yeah, and its been a week since he left me last Sunday- seee 1 week already n another 4 weeks left. Im getting used wif this rotation. Counting days for him to come home and when he’s here, am counting days for him to go offshore again. Heh. That’s part of a dreary truth of mylife. But as I said in the previous entry, im gonna take it in a very2 positive way. The 5weeks moment when we r farther from each other, its not really awful dewh. Im appreciating d’distance now. In fact, I feel auspicious wif d’5 weeks separation sumtyme bcoz its really make us appreciate each other more when we r together. So, to hell wif any1’s augury bout us – full stop.

Few frens commenting bout my entry lately bcoz its too mushy and full wif boyfren thingy. Okie, pardon me.wuwuwuuw…..But they said, they eager to know more bout our xtvties when mr boyfren is home. Usually, we always have plan to do or place to go when he’s home. Okie, for his last break, we juz spent most of d’tyme like what other couples usually do –movie, shopping, n urmmm, not so much interesting xtvties to be told I guess, but his last break was d’longest 1 and am happy spending most of d;tyme wif him eventho its just normal xtvties. (he’s very bz wif his work and so do i- so no vacation plus, it doesn’t make sense laaa if everytyme he’s home, we need to go for vacation – but I think doing lots of overseas trips (traveling) bfore having kids is what we gonna do, (he told me so…).. ouh ,we went to gunung senyum and cherating wif few of my best buddies (mun, aswad, hazel, fauzi) and we had lots of funs there.yippie =).. im gonna post bout it soon n seems like more pictures for u guys to browse. Heeee….



+ because relationship is a marathon, not a sprint +

Letting Go.....

I went for catching up session wif few ex skoolmates last nite sumwhere in malacca. (alang2 balik kg tu, go catch up wif member2 lamela kan).. lots of issues we’ve been talk about, and part of d’issues dat had been raised up are more about contentment in life.. and somehow they raised up an issue about my life…

“ur life ‘ve been blessed since u were young”

“what else u wish to have in life wanie, since I think u ‘ve got almost everything dat u want? “

“I think u have a perfect job, u r pretty, curvy and tall (ini betol2 ayat bodek, nak duet raye ke kawan2???cittt ) nice boyfren and happy life, u shud be grateful”



I think all guesses up there might be wrong. yeah, Alhamdulillah, I have a blissful life till today, but whutt u guys know bout what I should face in life afterall?

Lot and lots of things which no need for me to share wif every1 here. But trust me, life aint about things u bought, what car u drive, in what house u r living or what type of boyfriend dat u have (OMG, now I sound like my life is sooo complicated like im having responsibilities that I couldnt endure and sounds like my life is too painful- aiyooo)


No la, its just d’matter of d’way u handle ur life . im not a perfectionist type, so I juz let go few things which I think by having or getting it, my life would be perfect (soo simple- am i? paham ke?-hehehe) actually, what my opinion is –satisfaction in life wasn’t about perfection because I think perfection, in itself, is imperfect because we don’t get a chance to fail and learn from our failure. and please stop complaining about ur life! got ppl out there must be more suffer than u r! so trust me, every1 has their own problems and for me,i prefer to keep things between me n myself only.

Every1 has their own dreams, living in a life in a way they wished for, having sum1 who can make their life complete. But we wont always have what we wish in life, dats d;fact. Face it. Live wif it. Juzs live life to d’fullest and u’ll be happy. Dun wish for anything which is beyond our control to make it happen in d’future and dun expect too much in life. Live life as d’way it is. Change few things which u think It might giving u more happiness but what most important is , pray to GOD- always- in order to live in a peaceful life and to get continuous blessing from HIM. And dun forget to feel grateful 4 who u r and what u have now. Cintailah kesederhanaan diri anda seperti saye. =P (alamak, I sound like my dad rite? Or a motivator? ) hehe.

ok,change mode....

I tink I need to go get a new handbag for hari raya, am now longing for a handbag wif cane handle and gold detail or off-white leather bag maybe?...hehe…

Bottomline : I shopped 2 handbags in London last few months and it juz sitting inside the wardrobe most of d’tyme. I think it dusty now and need to be cleaned up.*sigh*

+ day 1st -on batmobile and a WII dance mat =) +

i cant believe i went to d'toilet for few tymes today to avoid ppl from noticing me crying. i was crying in front of my workstations everytyme my mind flew to amsterdam n catch d'picture of mR patrick..while listening to "hari raya song" that have been uploaded by him juz bfore he took off. mengade dengar lagu sdey (sepasang kurung biru) then sedar, tears already at d'corner of my eyes,so bfore org nampak,better gi toilet kan..wuwuwuwu... n i dunno y, dis is d'1st tyme ever i feel sooo sad after he leaves me. usually,i can juz get rid of it within few hrs after he took off. but not dis tyme,does it means, he really own my heart, isnt he?

okie,on d'way we went to KLIA, after i told him dat i gonna miss him sooooo much, he told me like "how if u ingat from d'1st day i blk dat day until d'next 5weeks, what we went tru n everything we did together"....so, the stories herein i think, maybe care ini sungguh bekesan to get rid off dis-soo-called-desperately-need-him-rite-now-feeling.hahahhaah..

so, on d'1st day he arrived, we meet up and he brought along a WII dance mate he bought in norway i think(purpose of buying: he know i'd love to dance anytyme i got chances to do dat, n to tone up my body tru dancing n of coz want to add up my extra xtvties at home and at d'same tyme making me less bored and he also bought me a box of Lindt chocs.(yummy....)so, i gave him batmobile in return (after few times thinking of kids stuff, i think im gonna support him on dis-hafto!-hishhh).

so, pics worth....

WII dance mat - mr bf knows me well =)

Batmobile -seems like we know each other very well =)

n here comes a 'macho' batman

a hero wif his bike

every1's all tyme fav hero "mR batman"

and "things" come and go

holla ppl..im back!!!

i know2..poyonye didnt jot down even a single word in this column when mr boyfren was around.haha. silela maafkan kami.
so,u ppl sure can guess dat he's leaving 4 5 weeks starting from today when dis entry posted. once again....he leaves me for quite huge number of days.sigh.. but no complaints...seriously,juz a lil sigh. a little... bcoz of being alone rite now...but honestly, deep inside my heart, i agree wif "distance" that we shud face n go tru 4 5weeks,bcoz it'll make us more appreciate every single moment dat we have when we spend our tyme together.serious people,it works! "distance" do keep us stong n more stronger each days.

huh, i juz sent him to KLIA, as usual, (dis tyme already my 6th tyme sending him to d'airport)i still cannot force my eyes to drop any tears. i dunno y,its hard for me to cry when seeing him go tru check in counter and going down to departure hall by escalator. my eyes hesitate to drop any tears. and i guess dats what he wants. he showed me how strong he is going tru dis "dramatic" moment and at d'same tyme he really hopes dat i can go tru it maturely and i can handle it welly.so, here im....crying alone at home.naah!!!!!wuwuuwuww..not really, i din cry..its juz i feel lonely, damne lonely rite now.but its ok,tyme will heal as every1 said.

ouh, and 1 of d'reason y i cudnt cry juz now was bcoz of parking system in KLIA.whutt d'heck i need to pay for 129rm for parking??? doesnt make sense rite? sgtla choy!!!! not us only, but got few ppl senasib dgn kami. so,to all, PLEASE DONT PARK UR CAR IN BLOCK A -KLIA. otherwise ull be charged for 129rm..huh, sudahla nak create mood nak nangis for dis farewell to agak susah,ade plak bende2 tk patut menimpe,lagila tak jadik.cissss..... so,mr bf accompanied me to mycar n kissed me goodbye on d'forehead. so,tidakla saye menangis.sekali lagi,gagal!hahahha....okie, 115am in d'morning n i have to go to work tomorrow. to mR azman patrick -U R 1 IN A' MILLION =)*kisses n hugs*

i showed mine, now show a piece of urs!

effort? where is it? show it to me!
at least... a piece of it...

miserable. meet it by mistake.
diffuseness. abviously dominating part of it now.

what else? is it fade already?

damne. dis mind suddenly stuck sumwhere in johore.
almost 8years ago punye cerite.mcm doinks!!

eiiii, cik hamidah yg mereng telah memakaikan bear saye dgn kimono n skirt.
she's having PMS rite now. dats y sumtyme she acted like she was out of her mind.haha
lets take a look of d'pic. ull laugh half dead! hehhhhehehehee..



+johnny (name given by cik hamidah) wif skirt n kimono =P+

on cooking and mY little effort worth..........him =)

hahahaha....last weekend, i skipped my "weekend routine" which is going to d'office and i drove all d'way to kajang (sounds like i drove about4-5hrs to be there-haha)
juz to ensure my "sambal ikan bilis tempe taste great (for first timer), d'ingredients are mixed well to produce 1 yummy "sambal ikan bilis tempe" in d'enD.

errmm, what's sooo special bout dat "sambal ikan bilis tempe" anyway?
bcoz mr boyfren love it to death (exxagerate-haha)and drooling most of d'tyme he sees dat so-called-traditional-dish.

haaa..soo,dats d'reason y i care to make it perfect enough to make sure mr bf wont give any complaint regarding to its taste and he wont hesitate to keep eating it until d'last pieces of those ikan bilis n tempe.thanks u . i know dat sambal is really easy to make but who knows better than a mother bout what his son likes to eat rite? d'son loves dat sambal to be a bit sweet or less salty or whatever-those-faddy-things-on-food. so ,i need to double confirm wif d'mom =)

so, last weekend i went to his sister's (kak lyn). she assisted me on chopping2 part, helped on preparing things which need to be cooked but d'major thing she did was judging me doing things.haha. hey2, i din try to bodek any1 here okie, if nak bodek bnyk care laen kot other than go there n offer myself to cook bcoz if u dun really know how to cook n pretending like u know, u might screw up everything and ull juz humiliate urself eventually rite? so, for cooking session wif his family is not call "bodek part" ok. i can do much better than dat than pushed myself into a hard tyme by cooking dishes for d'whole family n waiting for their judgement.all i do is juz bcoz of mR boyfren. i dun say dat i really know how to cook, im not pro in dis, im still "amatur" lagi so i need to learn n keep on trying to make good dishes n to be as a career women who has WII and remote control car at home, but she knows how to cook-hahaha (so,mr louqe, i wont be as d'second SS-wekk ...see,u judge ppl bfore u know em' haha) but deep inside my heart i wanted to turn pro in cooking one day in order to balance my ability in career and doing house chores.yess i need money to live and i need family to keep me happy. n ill feel blessed!

And Alhamdulillah, my luck dat day (maybe bcoz of my asisstant also gave full commitment while cooking wif me-so credit to kak lyn =)) ,full mark given to my sambal tempe.haha..cant wait to serve him sambal ikan bilis tempe. 15 more days to go =)


Ingredients

ikan bilis and tempe

Oil for frying

2 tbsp tamarind pulp combined with 100ml water (squeeze, then strain the tamarind juice)



Spice ingredients –

dried chillies, soaked and seeded and blended

shallots (big one)

Seasoning

4-4½ tbsp sugar or to taste

¾-1 tsp salt or to taste


Method
Heat a little oil in a wok and fry ikan bilis and tempes (seperately) and then dish it out.

Then, Heat a little oil and fry blended dried chillies. Add shallots.
Reduce the heat to low and add blended spice ingredients. Fry until fragrant( got scent of shallots tau n its nice)

Add and continue to fry for a while. Mix in tamarind juice and fry over a low heat until mixture is almost dry. (Keep stirring while frying to prevent it from sticking to the base of the wok). Add all tempe and ikan bilis. Adjust seasoning to taste. Dish out and leave to cool completely.

then, tadaa.. 1 easy dish completed. then i cooked tomyam and ayam masak merah. for dessert, i made puding wif d'source a nite bfore going to kak lyn's. here come d'pictures =)




::home made-by-me =P::tomyam,ayam masak merah, sambal ikan bilis tempe and kak lyn's sayur goreng






::dessert-pudding wif source::





::and hey, tadaaa-chef for dat day-haha::

Y bother?

bored stiff in d'house!
thinking bout water rafting dis saturday..
going or not going???

today,in d'office, i have no guts to do myjobs.
dunno y, but actually i did finish doing final report,
so i have nothing much to do.haha..

and what d;heck am i doing rite now?
i start typing drivel into mylappie,
and my mind whirring round n round....dewh!

thinking of going to post office tomorrow to renew mylisence
(OMG, due is today)-swear i forget bout it!
and r;mc even worse, her lisence was due on 16th july haritu.hahhhaa.choy!
and d'main purpose is to claim d'rebate -weeee!

im being judgemental nowadays even to every ppl on earth dat i meet.
dun ask me y,im also keep asking myself y.
even got judgement which over d'limit dat i suppose to think about.
if it was an error of judgement,ill deeply regrate in d'end of d'day.
and i shoud be penalized bout dat genuine mistake dat i've made.
whutever!

eiii, feel glad after having conversation wif mr bf =).missed him alot!
hey ppl,u can see my mood mixed up-gradually up n down!aggressive sungguh mood inikan?

anyway,im detox-ing for these few days. please tell cik hamidah to makan sorok2 dr i.
sangatla depress tengok die makan dgn bahagia.!!!huahuahuahua...

keyboard off!

am bored!

while aswad,mun and r'mc concerntrating on "d' parfume" movie in HBO channel, im doing sumthing better to crack d' boredemness inside me (i've watched dis movie bfore)- memang besh!

ouh yeah, a lil update bout bowling tournament dis morning (my team sure kalahla kan bcoz of me-haha)- d'highest score i got was 112.yeayy!gelakkan saye!whatever-but personally, ive made a record for myself for scoring above 100 (for d;1st tyme ever in mylife)_kuakuakua.....okie-survey in!

Q1. According to your ex, are you pretty/handsome?
* ex? i dun have any.tq!

Q2. How have you felt today?
* so-so- din felt tense wif discomfiture dis morn, felt great instead bcoz i spent tyme wif dalia, mun n aswad playing pool and fossball at ampang point -actually in my office, we got things like dat but i never gave a damn bfore *sigh* n now i feel like those things really enjoyable! .

Q3. When was the last time you had butterflies?
* i cant remember dewh! i think it was d'moment bfore we depart to lOndon, (at dat mo i can smell d'air of london n i can feel d'excitement of london's summer sales(wakakaka-)

Q4. How can someone win your heart?
* ask mr azman- he knows! *wide smile* and i value honesty n loyalty above all else! be honest n be loyal!

Q5. Have you ever kissed anyone over 21?
* ouh, shoud i kiss anyone below 21??

Q6. When was the last time you talked to your number 2 on top friends?
* who's in my no 2 list? hamidah? she's here wif me d'whole week kerana dia lari dari rumah. tq! hehe.

Q7. Do you have any plans for friday?
* ouh, long wayy to go babe!but pals, we plan to go for water wrafting on friday!hurrah!

Q8. Do you like your name?
* yeah. i'm. other than udect! tq =)

Q9. Do you like being in pictures?
* ouh, absolutely!eventho im not dat photogenic -haha

Q10. What color is your hair?
* pure black! ouh, a lil bit brownish inside, that part, i dyed!huhu

Q11. Is your bedroom window open?
*never dare to open it.tq n dun ask me y!.

Q12. What were you doing at 10:00am?
* rushed to ampang point for tournament registration,if i reached there 5 mins late, im very sure mr curtis will be mad at me! phew!

Q13. Name someone with the same b-day as you?
* errgghhh, i think got sum1 has same birthda s mine!but cant recall d;name.haihsss..

Q14. Are you a morning person or a night person?
* nite kot =P

Q15. Do you know if anyone likes you?
* hate assuming so, i guess i dunno until dat person tell me.

Q16. What were you doing at 4am this morning?
* in d' la-la- land! zzzZZZZZzzzz

Q17. Do people underestimate you?
* working in dis realm, i think people keep on underestmating ppl!whutt d'heck!

Q18. When you're in a bad mood, what will always put you in a better mood?
* my ability to ignore thing which is screwed up my good mood at dat mo, i guess...but unluckily, it will be juz for a while....

Q19. Do you wish someone would call you?
* ouh yeah..

Q20.Did you have a good day yesterday?
* ouh yeah,eventho i've lost in bowling tournament but i learned how to play pool n fossball and spent tyme wif frens?whut's better than dat? =)

Q21. when was the last time you took a picture with number 3 on your top?
* eiiii...sape ni?

Q22. Do you hate anyone?
* yesss!!!jerks!

Q23. Is there anyone you call baby?
* its refer to my other half =)

Q24. Do you still talk to the person you fell hardest for?
* yerp.i have to. untill all d'debts completely paid to me.

Q25. Is your phone within a meter radius of you?
* half meter maybe =)

Q26. What are you wearing?
* short n sleeveless.am homey.

Q27. What color is the thing you are sitting on right now?
* dark brown comfy sofa =)

Q28. I'll bet you miss someone right now?
* definitely.

Q29. Where do you think your best friend is right now?
* anywhere on earth cud be! +

Q30. Are you listening to music right now?
* nope....am listening r'mc commenting bout everything while she's watching devil wears prada!

Q31. Who else is in the room with you?
* am alone!

Q32. Do you wish you were somewhere else right now?
* yerp! somwehere where i cud kiss all d'things dat bewildering me away!

Q33. How long can you go without your mobile phone?
*me n mobile fon? cant be seperated!haha

Q34. What last made you sad?
* dis feeling..uneaxplainable!

D' reason y i love to be alone =)

the stories herein =)



*ateh's wedding day*



tadaaaa.....





*playin' D'wii =) +



lately, few frens keep on complaining bout my silence and even few of em think dat my disappearence in few "hang-out" sessions were bcoz i was bz dating, i was avoiding myself from 'em , or even few frens said dat i alread foget em. whoaaaa...
tak aci kot camni. firs tof all, my boyfren not even here wif me, he's away for 5-7weeks and be in mesia for juz 2-3weeks. so , so if 1 year got 52weeks, u calculate urself how many weeks (correction: days) i spend tyme wif him? please take not : if we have 52 weeks per year.ill juz spend 10weeks (more or less) wif him in a year. To be more detail : in a year, i'll be wif him for about 70days out of 365 days we have. so, please dun put d'blames on us if we spend tyme macam nak rak pon anytyme we have chances to be together. QUALITY tyme together is important here. TQ.

But back to d'issue up there, i want to make my point clearly here, bz -dating wasnt d'reason y i keep on saying NO to go hang out, moreover, during nite-out sessions. There r 3 things which keep myself bz in d'hse all d'tyme and thngs dat could make me happy to live with...

1)wii - d'boyfren bought it for me so dat i wont feel bored staying in d'hse
see d'picture? i think got lots of games dat i need to practise everyday so dat i can beat him again n again...hehehhhee....seee, bersusun2 kot games, got guitar hero 111 which is my fav game (it comes wif a very cool white guitar)-wooOOooo...




+lots of games rite?+ guitar hero, GT cars, wii sport, ironman




2) bcoz of DVD player and DIE HARD's collection (mr bf know d'way to make me less merayap and stay at home and remember him all d'tyme bcoz i think lots of things in d'hse remind me towards him, pandang depan, belakang, kiri, kanan-hish)-hehe.

3)izzi net which make my life easy to surf and more convenient-juz plug in dat "iburst" thing inside ur lappie card and tadaaaa- silela online dgn jayenye!.






+lappie wif iburst =)+




so, u tell me, whats d'thing out there which is more irresistable than all dis?
u tell me, n ill go out wif u-kuakuakuakau...

in short, i think i prefer u guys to come over to my hse once in a while and lets rockin' bebeh!wif d'guitar hero! *grins*

daaa....

+im back!!!! =) +

i reached home safely on 4th july 2008 and still in 1 piece. thank GOD. feel like updating dis blog wif d'story mory of my london trip but... r'mc is forcing me to go hav our din first n she's like shouting all d'tyme bout her famine.


okie...im back...we (hazel, r'mc, mun n aswad) went to flamingo ampang n i feel touched when they gave d-so-called-moral-support to me when they accompanied me to play bowling and at d'same tyme they tried to make me feel like "yeah, u can do it ,udect" eventho i know they were just pretending like i know hot to play but in reality, my score was suxxx... hehe. anyway buddy, love u guys so much!

errmm..lack of idea plak. lately ni, emotionally disturbed plak. ntah. its doesnt mean dat im not happy wif mylife. so far i feel gratefull wif mylife, wif everything dat i have. but..., "oh Tuhan, tabahkanlah hatiku, i feel afraid of what's gonna happen next in d'future" ......may dis happiness belongs to me forever...amen.

alamak, punyela cakap2, overlook bout London story plak.kuakua...tomorrowlaaa...=)

+ summer sale in L.O.N.D.O.N =) +

we r off to UK for d'whole week-hoOray!
main purpose :: to attend my darling ku'in' convocation actually, but its in aberdeen.. so,alang2 tu, tak salahkan ber shopping di London? =P and meet
may we have safe jurney there.amen. ok,phOto update.

i drag mr bf to IB and welcomed him to d'theatre wOrld-he loIke it-horraY!
189 perperson oOoOO for d'tix, if he doesnt like it,im gonna merajuk D'whole year-wakakaka...okie off peeps, i din pack my stuffs yet,n tomorrow d'flight is in d'morning plak..hish...

Iezawani Is Commenting About Her Life

Am pretty much depressed since last 2weeks. Y? is it bcoz of still not having very slender legs after did too much work out n food controled?? Or is it bcoz of long distance relationship which made me feel ignored by mr boyfren most of d;tyme?

Huge nO-nO for both! I din expect for a drastic change dat gonna happen to d’legs.in fact, lots of ppl talking bout its’improvement,and some of ‘em juz raising their eyebrow when I say dat im on diet n straightly ask me y and juz gave a simple comment like “dun be too skinny bcoz ull jjuz be like a “moving skeleton” and some said dat “its perfect enuff, dun bother or dun even think to let urself being hungry for something worse”.

Well, practically, its my body and I have my own plan on it “, I retort.bluek!
-errm, no la actually,im gonna take both good and bad comments as sumtihg dat cud regain my spirit to accomplish my mission-hee,to lose few killos.haha. juz wanna see myself lil bit thinner than bfore without sacrificing my “asset” –n u know whutt!haha.

And for d;second assumption, its really off d;track! Dis relationship brought me too much happiness than I expected. Feel grateful knowing him n I juz hope dat me n him gonna be together forever.amen. in fact,I have no complaints at all as im having d’greatest companion for myself after a very long searching.whoaaa-haha.

Ok,so what’s d'thing on earth dat cud make me feel like kicking sum1 ass err,even thinking of to do more than dat dis tyme. Yeah,im overreacting to my probs in d;office, did i?i’ve ever felt like dis bfore, I resolve dat this time will be better, but err…actually I juz feel tired wif all dis.2 years in d’world where ive never met my satisfaction.y? bcoz im not doing whut I think im gonna be expert in d;end or else,I feel like I have to do dis and dat bocz of dat “sesuap nasi’-ooo,now I sound pathetic!actually, dis feeling gonna come when I had no idea on what ive done for d’whole month or after sum1 considered as a big fish in d’office scold me or made me feel like im useless,I dun know dis and dat and erggh,wth?im still learning?whut do u expect?even I know sumtyme it was my mistakes ,but errgghh…i totally out of my mind I think!

Well, aftermath, it made me think of how slow am I in dis realm( I mean dis processing part) bcoz I think in my whole life I never felt like im so stupid as im rite now.err,I mean a bit slow to catch up things, opps!stop! yess, juz recalled sumthng, yeah I felt stupid when I tcomes to math! Wth? Numbers? Give me n im gonna Fail!try me n im gonaa drop! Maybe my job made me feel like its look like math subject in d’skool! I hate it. lots of numbers and even worse i need to work wif formulas.ouh mY GOD! physics man,its called physics! u gimme math,ill fail n if u gimme physic ill drop! sigh!!! and wif d'engineer title bhind my name (which i never wishd for to hold it),its juz reassure dat by hook or by crook ,no matter what happen, i hafto live wif those numbers and formulas for d'rest of mylife? D'rest?ermm...

all dis while, i wonder if i enjoy working here or i juz pretend like i love dis jobs but in d'end i juz feel numb.sigh.
yet,im still wondering bout other ppl who might also facing d'same ctuation wif me.i asked daddy n he replied "i think lots of ppl dun like their jobs,me either, but to live and to survive, u hafto feel grateful for what ur life has been destined"

errmm,but we can seek for happiness in d'other way 'round rite? which cud make us feel more comfortable after we found d'rite tune on how to breath happily every second in dis life and enjoying what's belong to us . who knows? so,shud i stay or not? errmm..... or else, maybe i hafto work hard to make myself falling in love wif my job and try to understand every single part of it?----again.. i dunno.sigh!.

Im piffling to much in dis post?let me be! im pretty much hectic wif dis job lately...