erghh.....im doing things slothfully today...today is weekend but i need to face all d'QC stuff and im going to hate dis obligation but need to bear wif it bcoz of d'money dat ill earn for myself n for shopping summore.feel like im a sluggard who doing things sluggishly and d tyme also moving slowly..its not dat i cannot bear in dis situation but mymind is juz not in here, i mean not in d'office but its going sumwhere else to KLCC kot...*big grins*...i need to buy a nitedress for an invitation of a candle lite dinner tomorrow.*wee* erghh...its not totallly bout dat thing for now,but what d thing is keep going in n out from my mind is bout myfren---a very deep sigh for dis part* im always asking y everything goes like dis and turns bad like dat eventually..yerp, i noe me,myself either also not come s a good fren,i admit dat especially in remembering myfren's birthday bcoz when it comes to memorizing thingy, i fail!!! but im lucky tho i hav chums who understand me and rather to stick wif me whenever my ups&downs..im such a lucky young lady who have omay,honey,r'mc,fara,ainor,mimi,my beloveD mustangs and others...but what can i say here is,all d'frens dat i hav are remain from mysecondary school.yerp,i was mixed 'round wif my uni chums but i juz realized dat even frens com n go,the greatest companion of mine still...... my school chums..
i dun want to evaluate more bout it here,eventho i feel a bit frustrated wif sum frens dat really make me sick n i feel like they cannot b s my best buddies...y im saying like dat?bcoz they cannot perceive my weakness,they didnt xcept myfault and they were not treating me like A friend.... okla...i need to evaluate more now,ive found many frens in UKM dat i always can hang out wif and sharing all d'puppylove story wif em..yerp,i hav 4kind of different troop dat had their different style n perception bout life.
1) mYcoursemates which i love most---aisyah,sham,ida,bai and i love em soooo much.they help me lotz during revisions and all d'schooling stuffs.but we were rarely catching up during exams bcoz i had no intention to move mybutt off to d'library during d'exam ppl (i'd rather studying wif lotz of ppl around me than in a silence condition like in a library)...i cannot bear u ppl.....but as i said,i had a boyfren in Uni,i have 4different kind of chums,so i need to divide mytyme wif each of 'em wisely...and i was really2 fail to make it happen.bcoz most of d'tyme i spent wif my bf especially when d'examination was around (yeah,dat was mYfault)..but my chums in this group were very2 understanding and did support me when my downtyme was catched me up. but now,everything's changing,i dunno y,i keep asking myself y & y ppl must avoid themself from me during my miracle tyme...and i got d'answer....dats bcoz of d'gap between me&em,bcoz of mystatus (which is about job) now....ppl,i keep saying... "s we go on,we remember,all d'tymes we had 2gether,and as our life change,come whatever we'll still b friend forever...."
i do love u guys,i wont achieve any victories without u guys....i beg and plead fall to myknees,please do keep dis friendship remain....i will never change ppl,juz sumtyme im very bz wif myjob and i cannot call n b in touch wif u frequently,but i do remember who u r in myheart.....
2)mYkuin,who was there for me and to her i gave all of mY"lovelife" story.....yeah,we tend to b s a party ppl when we supposed to b..... i love u kuin,juz s i said sumtyme i dunno d'level of ursatisfaction when it comes to friendship thingy.i juz noe dat our irretability and temperamental both are in a same level...and again...time is very limited dude....im sooo sorry...i cannot make every1 satisfy wif me....
3)KERISMAS-----i dunno i dun want to evaluate more bout dis.....i juz...might b u guys dunno me very well....u guys hope dat ill b there for u most of dtyme,calling n visiting u frequently....i wish i could but to b more realistic...i cudnt...i feel left bhind btw....feel isolated...i dun even hav tyme for myself and how cud i come to UKM every weekend to visit u all????stop comparing me wif each of u...i still keep sms-ing,YM and still hav tyme to say HI to u instead of hanging out wif u most of d'tyme...and i dunno whutt's d interpretatn of FRIENDS for u all now,i cannot make every2 satisfy wif me...sumtyme u guys need to start first n not juz waiting for me to buzz every1....what i want is juz ppl dat cud understand myctuation n myother obligations.....dats all.... s i said,we mwy forgive n forget sumtyme,dude!
4)mYza&ume----mY refreshment during weekend...*wee*...we did share many things and i love u both very much eventho sumtyme d'argument was conquering every single scene...but finally we can sit and talk to each other and u guys prefer to live in a forgive n forget ctuation...s i said..ppl do make mistakes..u guys rawks,dude!
juz for here....d'most dat i regrate bout mylife is when i heard a name of "HAMIDAH SYUAIBAH" I DUNNO how to start,how to say SORRY,how to xplain to ppl who feel like i was treating her badly and she felt irrevently.....i hurt her lotz and dat was in my "immature minded" moment and i deserve if she will treating me badly sumhow.....she never left me bhind,she dun want to say sumthing dat will offend me and she did give me d'value of a friendship once..... but i destroyed her thrust n loyal to me...and now we r farther from each other day by day....yerp,ppl grow up but our friendship seems D'other way around...and im d'1 dat shud b blamed....i noe sayang,i hurt u lotz...n dats y u keep neglecting me for years....after samura moment.....if i cud turn back tyme ill keep u s mybest buddY FOREVER....juz r'mc,please forgive me....dis thing keep haunting me for years....i deseve dis i noe..but seems like u still wanna b in touch wif me eventho its seems weird sumtyme and like we dunno each other very well like we used to b bfore...........million of SORRY n THANKS buddy.......
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